How To Handle Verbal Attacks

What do you do in situations that make your blood boil? Where you get home for the night and you’re upset at how people were speaking to others, or acting towards strangers.

This happened to me the other day and I can tell you that I got home filled with pent up sadness. Sadness that was so overwhelming I didn’t know what to do with myself. I felt so utterly bad for a stranger a woman had offended. He was doing nothing but his job.

I knew I would likely never see this man again, but I couldn’t help but see how affected he was by this woman’s words. How they absorbed into him and how he had to silence himself so not to react. I could see clearly he was hurting.

How do we work through these kinds of situations?

I sat for a while and did some breathing techniques, but that wasn’t doing anything. No matter what, I still felt this lump in my chest.

What did I want? To find this man and explain that he had every right to be upset, and that he was doing nothing to warrant the response he received from this woman. That it was okay, this woman who had said what she said was suffering too.

I tossed in bed until I asked myself this question: What kind of situation did I want to have happen? How could the situation look differently?

Instead of seeing what had happened, I replayed the event so the woman didn’t insult the man or berate him, but accepted his response because those were the rules.

By replaying the event this way it made me feel calm enough to fall asleep.

Then in the morning I dedicated my yoga practice to this man I didn’t know. The more I sent good feelings the less the act bothered me, because the more I felt he was capable of taking care of himself.

I knew he could see that the woman was suffering too.

Sometimes when we’re the target of outbursts or critical attacks it’s helpful to understand that the person who’s causing the blow is lashing out. By seeing their suffering we’re able to suffer less.



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