From Unconscious to Conscious Communication

For years I didn’t to pay attention to my language when talking with others.   Almost like my words were automatic. A friend said something then I did. A co-worker made a comment then I made a comment. Rarely, if ever, did I stop and think about what I was going to say, how I was going to respond, it all would simply fall out of my mouth.

What I didn’t know was that speaking unconsciously was affecting my relationships, not only with others but also myself, and well, the world. My automatic communication style was ruining relationships, fostering fear, nurturing self-doubt and making it really difficult to enjoy my life.

Our words have the power to create and inspire or to promote anxiety, fear and hurt.

If you’re like me, and you want to enjoy your life, then you want to start paying attention to your speech.

Start to identify phrases and words that make you feel good and those that make you feel bad. Asking yourself – was that nice? was that hurtful?

The more I looked at my word choice the more I saw how mean I was being and how much I was judging or criticizing myself. No wonder my relationships were suffering and my outlook wasn’t so optimistic.

The more I began witnessing my unconscious statements the more conscious I became. And the more conscious I became the more I  started to take responsibility for my words and how they were making me feel.

The more I cut the words that didn’t make me feel good the healthier my communication became with myself and in turn others and the world.

How then do you become conscious of your communication?

Take a look at how you’re speaking. Simply start to notice if it’s helpful or hurtful. Don’t judge yourself here – just notice it.

Exercise: Finish the ends of the following sentences

If I were 5% more responsible with my words

my relationships would ….

my career would ….

my life would ….

Feel free to post some of your sentence endings below!

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